Princess C's Pearls of Wisdom - Part 7

We haven't done one of these in a while so here is a catch up of a few crackers lately.

On a sleepover at her Nanny and Dodo's house, she was taken food shopping. Nanny asked her if she'd like some Ham and she said:

"Will they have Prosciutto Ham, Nanny?"

(Where the HECK did that come from?! We certainly don't have that at home, we blame Grandma!)

On a browse through the holiday section of the weekend paper I said "Oh boring golf holidays". At which point princess C said "Oh great I like golf holidays!" Nobody in the family plays golf so this stumped me and decided to quiz further about this golf holiday she had been on.

"At Centre Parcs of course, we played crazy golf and it was brilliant" was the response.

(Well how can you reply to that!)

Crazy Golf at Centre Parcs with Grandad

Lovely Auntie came for a visit and was telling Princess C a bit of a naughty joke about a girl doing handstands. "When she went home to tell her mummy, her mummy said but all the boys saw your knickers. Next day girl does handstands and when the mother questioned her about the boys seeing her knickers she said she wasn't wearing any".  Princess C within a bat of an eyelid replied "she should have worn tights".

No flies on Princess C!

Danger - low flying objects. No Swimming / paddling!

The only time you won't run the risk of being clouted in the head by something while paddling

I must've missed a memo, it's easily done I suppose. The memo where everyone was clearly given details of the headline of this article.

"Danger - Low Flying Objects! No Swimming / Paddling" - which of course applies to any stretch of water, be it sea, or paddling pool, local swimming pool or even a muddy puddle in use during the fine weather.

On holiday we spent most of our time in the hotel pool either dodging balls thrown the entire length of the pool (ensuring that no one could swim safely ANYWHERE for fear of being biffed by one), or people picking up on Wimbledon fever, playing tennis across the entire length of the water too. Not kids by the way, this was mostly adults (those who weren't clinging to their sunbeds having 'pre-booked' them with the towel routine at 5.30 in the morning - you know, like we laughably always accuse German tourists of doing).

Similarly in the sea, same deal applied (as well as on any stretch of beach we happened to lay a towel on to sit down in peace). Then when we got back to the UK and had a dip in the children's pool at Beale Park a 'lovely' little brat and his sibling were throwing a lawn dart across the water, completely unsupervised by their docile parents / grandparents (who were glued to their smartphones, naturally).

People say I grumble a lot. I probably do, but sheesh, IQ levels over the last 20 years seem to have dipped to single figures, and with no governmental move to introduce "The Common Sense Test" for would-be parents, this sort of dullard behaviour just seems to become more and more commonplace.

In my mind's eye, if anything did actually hit Princess C while she was innocently getting about the business you get into a paddling pool or swimming pool for (ie paddling and swimming), I'd grab whatever object hit her and either throw it as hard as I could at the parents, or far out of reach of the kids playing with it.

In reality I'd probably just swear a lot, grumble about it on a blog or something, and pray for rainy weather as usual :)

Summertime, and the livin' is queasy

Most of our neighbours during hot weather. On wash day. 

Much as I bemoan the cold, and the lapsed human need to hibernate in the winter, I really don't like hot weather or the summer.

We fight a constant battle on several fronts. To keep the house cool enough (and also dark enough) so that Princess C can get to sleep before midnight (not easy, as I'm sure most parents will attest). Getting enough fresh air (if indeed there is any moving air around, certainly isn't at the moment) before the neighbourhood barbecue fiends replicate the scene in the header image above and fill the air with the stench of burning dog poo, rubber tyres and charred flesh.

Creativity takes a dive, exercise routines are binned as it's just too durned hot to move. Sleep is something that happens purely through exhaustion rather than planning. Then there's the constant fight to cover your nearest and dearest (and youngest) in enough suncream to ensure they don't burn to a crisp. Slapping factor 50 on Princess C has to rate as the third worst summertime task (getting her to drink enough to stay hydrated, and eat anything probably rate slightly higher).

But it is nice to see the sun, soak up a bit of vitamin D, and on those rare moments when you can escape into the wild, get away from it all, and find a small pocket of quiet and calm anywhere in our countryside, it can completely change your mind (so that'll probably be what we'll attempt every weekend that the weather holds).

I just wish someone would invent a portable air conditioner that fits in your pocket!

It's already been a year (nearly) at school...

Where does the time go!

Princess C has been at school since last September and is fast approaching the end of Reception. We can barely believe that it's been that long, and that we're now looking towards Year 1 with our little girl and wondering what new things she'll learn, what new quirks she'll have to deal with and most of all how much she'll miss her current teacher (luckily all her friends are moving up with her so that does make the transition a little easier).

We feel so lucky that it's all been a relatively smooth ride, bar a few of those mornings where Princess C is ultra clingy and doesn't want to be there (thankfully with her brilliant support teachers and of course her current teacher, there's always someone there with a cuddle and a distraction to help her settle).

Year 1 is where the kids start to knuckle down a bit. There is still play (hooray!), there's still only reading homework plus a few worksheets here and there, and hopefully the kids will still get to go outdoors like they currently do. I think we made the right decision on where she ended up when quite off her own back, she said how much she was looking forward to Year 1 and how she wanted it to start RIGHT NOW!

Things could've been so different. Thinking back a year, at how we'd only just found out we'd got a place at this school and how stressful the year preceding that news was, it was a horrible time and probably one that's all too familiar to parents these days. If you're going through that now, you have my utmost sympathy. It's not fun, we know.